This episode is a raw one for me. It came out of the blue, right in the middle of an overwhelming season. There’s been a lot happening personally and medically within my family, and when that happens, I tend to put my head down and just get through it without really processing what’s going on.

After a long, exhausting day, I was putting the kids to bed and completely lost it. I yelled, immediately felt terrible, apologized, and ended up crying. It hit me at that moment—this is restraint collapse. We talk about it all the time when it comes to kids; they hold it together all day and then fall apart in their safe space at home. But sitting there in tears, I realized I was experiencing the adult version of restraint collapse.

All day long, I can show up for clients, for work, and for social media. But when I walk through the door to my husband and kids, my patience and energy are gone. The guilt that comes with realizing I can give my best to strangers but not always to my family—it’s heavy. That moment was a wake-up call.

I asked myself what I could do to change it. I talked with my kids about creating a safe word they can use when they notice I’m not being my best self. I’ve been working on supporting myself better in this season—prioritizing movement, validating my feelings, being honest with Jay, gratitude journaling, cutting screen time, using my noise-canceling headphones, and giving myself a short transition period when we all get home.

We talk a lot about helping our kids cope with restraint collapse, but not what it looks like for us as adults. Hard seasons will always come, but how we care for ourselves through them can change. My hope is that this episode reminds you to take a step back, give yourself grace, and focus on the small things that help you breathe again. This season won’t last forever.